Breast Torture

I am now going to therapy for a clogged milk duct. The breast shield on my breast pump is apparently too small and has caused the clog around my nipple. For this I have gone to therapy for two days in a row so far. Therapy consists of 10 to 15 minutes with a heating pad, 20 minutes or so with this heated ultrasound wand thingy, and then some amount of time that seems to go on forever of "breast massage". I put that in quotes because that's what they call it but I call it breast torture. Honestly, I could handle massage on all the rest of my breast no matter how tender and sore, but this "massage" around my nipple is awful. I honestly wish I had that weird nipple torture fetish because then it wouldn't be so awful. Howie and I ordered extra large breast shields for my breast pump so that this doesn't happen again. The clog is still there but doesn't hurt as much right now. Thank God! Another really awful gross thing happened to my nipple the other day. I noticed that there were these weird bubbles around my areola just beneath a thin layer of skin. I touched them and they popped and milk came out. Umm, seriously, I wanted to vomit. I really don't know why breastfeeding has to be so difficult for some people. My Mom said she never had a problem, I wish I was as lucky. I'm sticking with it though. Why quit now, if I have to go in for breast torture twice a week no matter what then I might as well keep going and make it worth it.

Ok, enough about breasts and nipples! Howie's parents and brother came over today. We thought they were going to come over tonight but they came this afternoon instead and sent us away to get out on our own for lunch. I seriously wasn't ready to leave my little princess behind. I know that they aren't going to kill her, but I just don't feel like I need to get out and away from her right now. I also wish that if I was going to be kicked out of my house for a little date with my hubby that it was for dinner. Lunch is my least favorite meal of the day, it's boring. Sandwiches, burgers, soups, salads. Bleh! Yay, sometimes they're good but I'm never like "Damn! I wish I could really get out for a good bowl of soup or a kick ass turkey sandwich!" I'd really rather go out for dinner, have some wine and dessert. That would be nice. That's what Howie and I need to get out for, but they sent us out of the house and we had to be back in about an hour. So, we drove around trying to find something we'd like and couldn't settle on anything. We ended up getting some really crappy sandwiches and a couple of sodas at a place where there wasn't any seating so we ended up bring lunch home with us and eating it in our living room, so the first outing without the baby kinda sucked. Oh well. Maybe we'll be able to go out and have some wine eventually! That would be awesome because I REALLY miss drinking! Then again, having a glass of wine right now would probably knock me out immediately. I'd rather have a babysitter so that Howie and I can sleep rather than so that he and I can get out. We're so tired right now that I couldn't fully enjoy a movie or dinner.

So, how is the little princess you may be wondering? She's great! Super cute. We spend lots of time during the day doing tummy time or having skin to skin contact. She likes to lift up her head and look at me a lot. She makes a cute little squeaky noise like a mouse and during feedings she'll sometimes take a break and make a lip smacking noise. Her umbilical cord fell off a few days ago and she has just recovered from her first diaper rash. She's completely perfect!