Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Aislinn Turns 2!

Hi there. Sorry to write such a weepy post and then not return. I'm still sad and we have talked about adoption (thanks D.K.). We actually talked about adoption a while ago. At this point we don't have enough money for adoption or IVF so, maybe we'll revisit that someday but for now we're just trying to keep our heads above water. I guess in that sense it's good that I'm not about to have a baby in 10 days.

So, Aislinn turned 2 on January 29th. We spent her actual birthday alone with her. We didn't have family or friends over, we just wanted it to be the 3 of us. I pretty much let her have her way all day unless she was doing something naughty. We had so much fun. Our neighbors came over with a cake around lunch time and the kids played and then had some cake. She took a short nap, the shortest nap ever. When Howie came home we opened gifts, had dinner, made cupcakes with Aislinn and then ate them. Then she had a bath and went to bed. It was a good day.

On Saturday we had her birthday party at The Little Gym. It was the easiest and most fun birthday party ever. I want to have my birthday party there. LOL. The kids ran around and played on the gym equipment but we also played with the air track that blows up and they jump on, and the parents were allowed on too! We played with the parachute, bubbles, this giant wheel that they got to roll over. It was a good time. Then we ate cake which I made so that it was peanut free for my niece, vegan for my neighbors, and gluten free for a friend of ours. It was tasty. Family came back for lunch and to open gifts. My sister, brother-in-law, niece stayed late and had pizza with us. My sister-in-law was there for the weekend so it was nice to see her. My brother wasn't there because he's somewhere in Iraq right now. It was a really good time.

I can't believe how grown up she is. Yesterday we went in for her 2 year check-up and she got to stand on the scale, stand against the wall to be measured, had her blood pressure checked for the first time, and she got to wear a little gown. She's so grown up. I can't believe it.

I made a montage of her second year. She was such a baby last year and now she looks like a big girl! Ok, enjoy the montage!

Monday, January 26, 2009

Pregnancy Symptoms?

Ugh, I'm on birth control but it's sugar pill week and I have not yet had my period. The whole reason I'm on birth control is to make sure my period comes and then goes. I clearly don't need it for pregnancy prevention. How silly. I did eat some grapefruit though so I guess if I were the lucky type I could have gotten pregnant. That so doesn't happy to me though, let's not be ridiculous. I am extra weepy lately though. I have no problem breaking down and crying over absolutely nothing at all. And I've been sooooo nauseated. I don't even want to think about eating. So, what the hell is going on with all the symptoms. Ugh. I love the worst of the symptoms when a baby is involved but there is no such thing right now. I peed on a stick on Saturday night and then again last night. BFN. Why do I bother? I hate pee sticks.

Maybe it's just me. No joke, EVERYONE I know in town is pregnant. Ok, just EVERY woman. If they're not currently pregnant they just had a baby. I really can't take it anymore. I feel like my head will explode. My husband told my neighbor that I'd be coming to her Pampered Chef party yesterday because he thought it would be good for me to get out. Are you kidding me? The moment I walked in her door I went straight for the bottle of wine and filled up my glass. I stood there for an hour drinking as much wine as possible so I wouldn't break down in front of everyone. I'm usually a happy drunk so I was thinking that if I got drunk enough I wouldn't care that my neighbor's pregnant belly finally popped and I lived through watching guest after guest getting a tour of the nursery. About 1 1/2 bottles later I was able to take the tour myself. Then we had to look at pictures of her and her other pregnant friend putting their bellies together. Oh God! All I could think about is how I should be hugely pregnant right now. I should be due to have a baby a few weeks from now. I should be meeting my new baby on Valentine's Day. This whole thing is becoming unbearable. Aislinn is turning 2 on Thursday and I can't stop thinking about how quickly she grew up and how I could just go back and slow things down because I'm not going to get to do that again. I sound like her birthday makes me sad. It doesn't really, I just wish you could go back and visit little moments again.

Aislinn is great. I love her like crazy. She is more and more amazing every day. She's the best thing to ever happen to us and I'm thankful for her every day of my life. I love her so much I want more.